For anyone that has dealt with a kid with mental issues, particularly bi polar disorder or schizophrenia, I don’t have to inform you that it’s pure hell. As his parents, my wife and I struggle everyday with the guilt feelings of not being in a position to be able to do enough for our child. As the leader of our home I am continually looking for a better way to handle this struggle.

Our boy is currently twenty-one years of age and even though he’s residing in an apartment on his very own, we have to stop by everyday to make certain he will take his medication. He’ll never have the things many of us would certainly refer to an ordinary lifestyle. It simply breaks each of our hearts to consider how the tiny wonderful innocent baby boy that my wife and I welcomed in to our house at the incredibly early age of 90 days old will in all probability never maintain employment or have a family of his own. Any person that does not believe that bi polar as well as schizophrenia is not really a destructive condition, has to see the life of our adopted boy.

He used to love to drive! He took the bonds that his grandfather had been given to him every birthday since his very first one and bought a car at his graduation. He also enrolled in a Trade School to become an industrial electrician. I can’t tell you how excited we all were for him even though at that time the only thing that had manifested itself was the bi polar disorder. My wife and I helped out by taking out a college loan in our name to help pay for the schooling and books. He had just turned eighteen a few months earlier.

I guess he made it through about four weeks of school before he began missing a day here and a day there. Before you know it he was missing two or three days at a time. Not long after he dropped out completely. We were very upset with him at that point not knowing or understanding that he not only had bi polar but now he was beginning to take on the mental illness of schizophrenia. We had no idea except that we began to see stranger and stranger behavior from him.

It wasn’t long after this that he totaled out his car on one winter day. He was driving too fast and slid it into a tree right in front of someone’s home. We still didn’t fully understand the illness at this point and just believed he was being irresponsible. He had dropped out of college, wrecked his car, didn’t have a job, and wanted to sleep all the time. In our book he was just being lazy and irresponsible.

What we were clueless of was that the pacing, speaking with nobody, the sleeping, the unpredictable actions was part and parcel of bi polar and schizophrenia disease. The regrettable factor was that this was only the tip of the iceberg. All heck was starting to expose itself and we failed to recognize precisely what we were in store for. His bed room was in the basement and he wasted most of his time down there in most cases sleeping. On the other hand, he then would spend the majority of his nights up, going through the fridge and cabinets creating chaos. Not to say he seemed to be wandering through the entire home creating disturbance and keeping the rest of us awake.

Argument following argument occurred, but no progress was made. If you have any understanding of bi polar disorder or schizophrenia you’ll know that without the right medicine it gets completely out of control. Well that was precisely what was happening. In the true sense of the word, things were getting crazy. Our solution was that we needed to be much more forceful and demanding of what we expected of him. Wrong answer, at least in our case!

He was becoming more and more delusional. He began referring to the house as his and we were guest there. He began unusual gestures with his hands and head. He would stare right through you without saying a word while you would be talking with him. After a few seconds he would then answer a question you might have asked two or three minutes ago. He became more and more aggressive in his behavior. His mother began to get frightened of him.

This all continued until the day he completely exploded into violence. He swung and struck his mother in the eye. Although I wanted to unload on him, I took him to the floor and held there until the police arrived. I never used that much energy to hold a person down. He struggled with every ounce of his being to get loose. I was not about to let that happen until the police arrive. He would bite my arm that I have around his neck and face. I spent twelve years in the Marine Corps and never did I experience anything so completely out of control.

I realize that I wanted to beat him to a pulp but could not simply because he was my son. The police finally arrived and was able to hand cuff him. They knew immediately that he experienced some type of psychological problems. They didn’t arrest him based on our pleas to get him psychological help. They instead placed him on a hold in a local psychological locked ward.

Once he was evaluated they immediately determined he had not only bi polar, but also schizophrenia. It was like a light went on for my wife and me. It was good to know that there was a reason for his behavior and not that he was just a misfit. That has not made life any easier, but now we understand more about it. As a matter of fact we are becoming experts through the school of hard knocks. Not a school you want to attend, trust me.

If you’re a parent who has a kid with either bi polar disorder or schizophrenia, trust me when I inform you that we understand. Get assist and stay focused.

Learn more about Leadership Stories of all types including dealing with Bi Polar Disorder in Your Child. Stop by Gregory Covey’s site where you can find out all about Leadership Stories of all types including dealing with Bi Polar Disorder in Your Child and what it can do for you.

Tags: Mental Health

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